My brain handles new situations much more methodically. I am beginning to look towards the horizons of my life, enacting the rudiments of a plan for myself. I am no longer tied to one set future, and am free to venture toward multiple goals. My goals are no longer centered upon others, nor a projection of my internal insecurities. I am improving myself, and only through this primary action can my world become a better, more vibrant place.
This newfound autonomy has its upsides. Remarkably, given my position on the fringe of my old life as a foreign teacher, I have notched over $10,000 in the bank in the past four months. Just as remarkably, my parents have forgiven my outstanding college debts, and the albatross which looped hungrily about my neck has flown for other, drearier seas. I am already lucky to be a young American - to be that and debt free is colossal. Thus: a huge and lasting thank you to mama and papa Horst.
I have been to Thailand and had some wonderful experiences. The place is a paradise. I enjoyed the sights, though due to the nature of the workshops, most of my adventures were internal. Kyle, my friend and coworker, had an even more enlightening experience, with a full Kundalini awakening, a bunch of new friends, and a beautiful and intelligent Australian girlfriend Megan, whom he somehow coerced to leave paradise to join us for a three month contract in central China. At any rate, Thailand was beyond exquisite, and I will detail the trip in full with my next entry.
In the meantime I’ve climbed a couple mountains and went on a few vacations here and there. I’ve taken up a second teaching job on weekends, and the kindergarteners I minister to bring new meaning to the word ‘adorable.’ I met some lovely foreign friends: Joel from Vancouver and Claire and Leon Frey of Michigan and Manchester. Claire’s care, Leon’s wit, and Joel’s easygoing nature are braided into our regular game and movie nights. Together, they have mitigated the often isolating experience of life in a foreign land, and I for them.
My oral Chinese is slowly improving, but reading and writing is still beyond me. On paper and at pay time, I am technically an expert. In practice though, my three lovely TAs, Sophie, Amy, and Cedar hold my hand throughout much of my daily life. They handle my Chinese communication and coordinate my affairs with the local authorities. I would be lost without them, as they well know, and make up for this somewhat by rising with the electric roosters at dawn to supervise morning exercises. This allows them an extra hour of sleep, and when the workday lasts from 6:00 AM - 9:00 PM, that hour certainly counts. I enjoy the privilege of a fairly comfortable schedule, for which I am duly grateful. Many Chinese teachers do not have a full day’s break, settling for Saturday evening and Sunday morning for a break. A 24 hour leave, perhaps, but inconceivable to many in the west.
I have become a much better teacher in the past six months, and I owe a debt of thanks to Kyle’s influence. He really cares in the classroom, regardless of the input of the students, and if he makes education his career he will make a difference in many young lives. He also inspired me to undertake a pushup regimen which has wrought sweeping changes on my musculature and bearing. Still, even his Herculean presence as Assistant headmaster could not forestall that slowdown familiar to so many students and teachers in response to the irresistible advances of summer.
At the beginning of the semester, Kyle and I set up a system of strictures to govern student behavior. We have since learned that our powers for discipline are sadly limited. Two of the students have severe respiratory problems, owing to a parental indulgence of their smoking habits. We have tried to confiscate their cigarettes, but they somehow always end up with more. These same students sleep in class, and disciplinary measures do little to alter their behavior. Eventually, even Kyle threw up his hands, and I did the same. While we have achieved some successes. The students no show up to class on time more often than not. They are also bereft of their cell phones and PSPs. Of late, there has been a marked drop in student-teacher stabbings. This is a first year school, and is hence a haven and last resort for behaviorally challenged youth. The students’ grades are in free fall, but as Chinese academics are entirely dependent on test scores and our students joined an International school to escape the national tests, our marks matter little to either the students our the administration. Perhaps as a direct result of this policy, the students break more rules than they obey.
Their delinquency may be due in part to our winnowing contracts. Kyle and I will only be teaching for two, perhaps three more weeks at the maximum before going off on our respective trajectories. Kyle and Megan will likely take a summer teaching position in East asia, returning to California for Kyle to finish his teaching degree. I will circle China with my good friend Alex before heading south overland to reach mystical Bali, Indonesia. I will stay there, traveling and learning for several months. My current mental schematic has me returning to the east Coast for a family Thanksgiving, but life is often not so predictable. The fates, however, are kind. Tanner will shortly be transforming into a demigod at Deep Springs, and so the old Honda Accord will be awaiting me in North Carolina. The road is open wide, and wherever it leads, I greet it with open arms.
